Hog representatives from nations across the globe flew
in to attend the rally. Porky Pig, Olivia the Pig, Piglet, Squealer, Gub-Gub,
Wilbur, were some of the more prominent snouts in the crowd, who linked their
curlicue tails and strutted alongside the United Kingdom’s very own Peppa Pig,
the bright star of Channel 5, who led the charge in the pigs’ march against
Oxford’s boar blacklist. When asked for a direct quote on her thoughts concerning
Oxford’s act of censorship, Peppa Pig simply “oinked.” Oink is no longer
another four letter word—it’s now a rally cry.
North American publishers remained somewhat sympathetic
to Oxford’s pig plight. Aware of the commercial limitations of some books, they
noted that many European children’s publications don’t reach the bookstores and
libraries on the other side of the pond due to their nudity and sexual content,
which has been deemed too puritanically inappropriate for the young Canadian
and American readers. However, the same North American publishers feel that
Oxford’s publication ban on pigs could create a slippery slope affecting
freedom of speech. “It seems ridiculous that little Johnny can’t be shown to be
eating a bacon double cheeseburger in a picture book. As long as Oxford [University
Press] doesn’t publish books of naked people having sex with pigs, I think that
they should reverse their anti-pig policy,” said one prominent American editor
from HarperCollins, who asked to remain nameless.
In an act of defiance,
all pigs in attendance staged a mass dual conversion to both Judaism and Islam
on the front steps of Oxford University Press’ offices. Standing in solidarity,
Jews sent rabbis from all over—Israel, Canada, Australia, England, Germany,
South Africa, and even the solitary one left in France—to preside over the
conversion, given the unspoken Semitic sanctioning of the post-Sabbath Sunday
brunch ritual indulgence that involves a few slices of crispy bacon. Famous
Imams from the Middle East flew in to preside over the Testimony of Shahada. Muslims,
Jews, Christians, Hindus, Bahá'í, and Buddhists also showed their support by carrying signs and wearing T-shirts
emblazoned with “#JeSuisCochon” (or #IAmPig), as they participated in the march.
According to eye witness accounts, the million plus
porker protest was a success making it clear that the world will ensure the
preservation of the pretty pink cloven hooved animals in all forms of
literature. Reverend Al Sharpton’s sentiments noted in his closing address to
the protestors captured the spirit of the event: “If we remain silent, and
allow Oxford University Press to sanitize its pages of swine, purify its
publications of pigs, and bowdlerize its books of boars, who will be next on
the chopping block?”
[Author’s Note: This piece was inspired by this
article: http://news.nationalpost.com/2015/01/14/oxford-university-press-allegedly-barred-pigs-and-anything-pork-related-from-childrens-book/]
© 2015. Naomi Elana Zener. All Rights Reserved.
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